Changing My Focus

“The Lord is merciful and will not reject us forever. He may bring us sorrow, but his love for us is sure and strong. He takes no pleasure in causing us grief and pain” -Lamentations 3:31-33

It’s been almost seven months now since my husbands dad moved in. I can honestly say I have learned a lot about personal struggles I didn’t ever take notice to. The 10 years I have cared for my mom I thought to difficult and hard because of her mental disorders, but I have learned it wasn’t really her issues that were the problem nor is it my father in laws issues that are the problem but it was and is my own personal reactions whether in my thoughts, my heart, my attitude, spoken, or unspoken that were the problem. It doesn’t matter how frustrated with their life situations they are or if they use me as an outlet. Yes, there are times I have felt wronged, and had those “I CAN’T BELIEVE THEY ARE ACTING THIS WAY” moments and yes at times it has even seemed like everything was falling apart. But now that I have taken a time out from feeling sorry for myself I see that once again my focus got off track.

God’s word says, “The thought of my pain is bitter poison. I think of it constantly, and my spirit is depressed. Yet hope returns when I remember this one thing: The Lord’s unfailing love and mercy still continue, fresh as the morning, as sure as the sunrise. The Lord is all I have, so in him I put my hope.” -Lamentations 3:19-26

When it feels like your world is falling apart, it’s so easy to focus on the pain, the problems, the pressure and the difficulties. But when you do that you are letting your spiritual vision be blinded by the glare of what your physical eyes see. Now my focus is back on God’s love and what He is wanting to change in me through the experience He has me in. God gives us the strength and endurance to handle all He places before us.

Are you doing things His way.? 

Holy Spirit lead me! In the midst of everything I have remained faithful in my prayer life and when I couldn’t pray, I worshipped and when I couldn’t worship I kept my focus on His word and writing while spending time in devotion, which at times I couldn’t do all these things on the same day or week for that matter. But our faith can’t grow if we don’t spend the time where we need to be with God. Sometimes it just felt like nothing had an end, I battled depression, the thoughts of giving up, doubt, even considered not being a disciple for God. Why.? Because life is just to hard. (can you imagine that.?) Boo HOO! Don’t worry I flushed the pity potty. We make dumb mistakes when we start doubting God’s love and take our focus off of Him. I’m glad He got my attention again before I made a wrong decision.

I know my God is Bigger than anything i could ever face. I believe that even though my flesh may fail at times, my God never will. I will keep my focus on God as the Holy Spirit leads. (If I will get out of His way and let Him not just sometimes but all the time.) There is something God is working on in me through this season and I know there is a blessing ahead as long as I can endure, embrace, and move forward the way God wants me to. As my Pastor says, “I need to get out of my own way and stop blocking the blessings God has for me.” Because that’s the problem. I’m blocking the blessing. I will continue walking out what God has placed before me.

What has God placed before you.?

My mindset- I will not give up. I CAN DO THIS! I WILL DO THIS! WATCH ME!

If you want to change your life you have to change your focus, right.?

I’m changing my focus and putting it on the one thing that is sure and true and what I know. My focus is on God and knowing that He loves me through it all.